October Reset

Alright, it’s time for a big ‘what am I doing’ reality check.

Last night I realized I’m further behind than when I started loll

I finally admitted to myself that I can’t move forward as half-assed as I currently am. Or was.

Did I bite off more than I can chew; well I was definitely not as prepared as I should have been in launching my company or my podcast. It’s mostly the ol’ patience, with his predictably lazy pal procrastination rearing their ugly heads at me again.

But my biggest problem – even more so than the aforementioned p&p – in an honest first-time-said-out-loud admission to myself:

Holy crap I am by far the most disorganized person I have ever known. It’s unbelievable! 🐮

Gotta call myself out, being brutally honest – time to put my big girl pants on & start over from scratch. So, September 30 you’re the final page in that chapter. Clean Slate.

Fresh start 😏 Start over as many times as you need to.

You know you spend way too much time on the miniscule screen of your phone when you finally take a look at what you deemed sellable work – only to discover that most of what I thought was awesome, really sucks on a computer screen when blown up.

I must admit, pathetically – I never even bothered to take the time to see if what I had chosen would in fact look just as good when blown up to print or poster size.

Just had to go, go, go –

Sure it kept me busy; but busy frazzled, not busy accomplishing as I should have been👶🤖👶

Launched April 20 – 6 months later I’m still “trying to get organized.”

🤩🐾😏🐾🙄🐾😅🐾🤣🐾😋🐾😉 🐘

I’ll only be efficient, productive & naturally more professional, once I learn how to get organized, & it’s ok that I don’t know how right now.

There’s no “I Can’t.”

There’s only “I Presently Struggle With.”

Ready, set, Reset.

Time to take it down a notch,

& time to take it up a notch.


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The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Bloggers

https://wp.me/p5oeKw-33

Excellent post!

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“How To Think For Yourself & Why You Should” #Reblog from #Hubpages

A woman after my own heart 😉 We must remind people to take things they hear with a grain of salt, & encourage them to research & investigate for themselves. I think there’s more disinformation, propaganda & controlled opposition campaigns today than there’s ever been in the past – and they’ve been going on for decades & decades, longer than most realize.

How To Think For Yourself & Why You Should


 

7 Types of Souls – Which Are You?

SOUL TRAVEL RULES: “There Are 7 Types Of Souls In The World — What Type Of Soul Are You?”


Original post by: BlueDragonJournal

7 Types of Souls


People Can’t Change

Who said that? Surely you jest! When was the last time you heard that phrase? Do you agree or disagree? Can you remember who said it & why? Of course people can change – if they want to. And that’s the only reason they should. All else is futile.

Troubled Relationships: Two individuals who struggle with their own authenticity unconsciously conspire toward an inauthentic relationship. This is one of the largest impediments to successful relationships. Two individuals struggling with their own authenticity won’t experience a thriving relationship. What we might refer to as a troubled relationship is actually a manifestation of the challenges each individual face in their own personal evolution, but just further projected onto the external relationship. It’s the exceptional individual who seeks authenticity.”

Source: ‘Seeking Authenticity

So who might say such a thing? Insatiably curious I am. Could be:

  • those with no desire to change
  • those who think they don’t have the power to change
  • those whose partner is trying to change them
  • those who are trying to change their partner

Excellent advice here, I completely agree with this list – how many of these do you do?

Authentic Relationships – Do You Have a Genuine Connection?

If you aren’t in an authentic relationship, you’re essentially dating a layer. A mask. There is no relationship. It can be a toxic mess. I always thought setting out to change the one you’re with was complete insanity. What they should have done was change the one they’re with for a completely different one more like what they actually want. No one should be trying to make you into what they think you should be. Nor should you ever ask anybody to change for you. Why would you choose a partner based on everything you don’t want – it’s insanity. Pick someone else.

Oh, you wanted to buy a red shirt but you bought a blue one? Are you going to sit at home all night crying, yelling at the red shirt – begging it to be blue?

That infamous Jim Carrey scene in Liar, Liar plays on my inner movie reel:

Why get a cat if what you really wanted was a dog? Why try day after day after day to get that cat to fetch, sit, stay, lay down, or roll over, to no avail? Why not just go out & get a dog?!

Learning as much as I can about human behavior, human nature, & both enlightened & twisted psyches has helped me ‘read between the lines’ – read people far beyond the limited verbal communication, & helped my awareness skyrocket.

I changed. Because I wanted to.

Cuz why drink one beer at a time when you can drink 4 & go from sober to blackout within the hour? Who does that? An unawakened Soul. Anybody can change, I’m living proof. And I’m far from the only one. I can think of a few people who I know who have done so just as drastically.

Took me a long time to realize & rid my life of all the toxic people in it. Funny (but not really funny – it sucks) when those ‘who care about you most’ refuse to accept you for who you are. What that translates into it is they who cannot accept themselves for who they are. It is of the utmost importance to Wake Up, to Find Yourself; the amount of suffering we cause ourselves & others before we do is incredible. So many of the problems we faced within ourselves, others, & in relationships was due to not yet having had the necessary awakening in which self-awareness & self-reflection are born. The necessary life lessons must be learned to help you grow & evolve in order to operate in a different, much better manner – from a place of gratitude, kindness, love, compassion, honor, empathy, harmony & respect.

This meme so accurately describes my journey so far, & cracks me right up every time!

growfromgrowth.png

Remember to just be yourself.

Never apologize for who you are.

My favorite awake ‘n’ aware friend kindly reminds me to never apologize for being who I am. How refreshing – I love it 😉 He is so right on. Very very wise. I don’t know if he knows the importance & the depth of that truth for me, & what it meant to me to hear that. Such a good friend. I’ll be sure to let him know 😉 I’ve met so many ‘like-souled’ souls on WP, people I’m proud to call friends. I love you all.

Awake 🙂 I want to explore, play, wonder 😉

Soulmates


Poems From My Teenage Self (Pt4): ‘The First Kiss’

This would be 1987 – 16 yrs old


All I need is to hear a soft word whispered

or your breath in my ear

and my heart skips a beat

when I’m alone I close my eyes

and picture myself leaning into you

ever so slowly

I gently close my eyes

I feel your breath against my face

as I’m moving closer

gently our lips meet

and I’ve never felt more intensity than at this moment

we press our lips together & experience this –

our first kiss

we hold on to the moment

the Eternal kiss

but just before we escape into a world of our own

and in anticipation of kissing you again

I pull away

our lips tightly parting

and I know that I would go crazy

if I never felt this way again

as I stare into your eyes

there’s this understanding

this feeling that we are both completely aware

of the fire that’s been ignited between us

unaware of the world outside your eyes

your arms caressing me tightly throughout the night

and I think we both realize

that nothing could be more right.


If I blow on it it might turn to dust loll

Begin Again


phototasticcollage-2016-06-16-23-29-56


Passion in waves

So intense they pummel

Rolling me over

and over again.

Crushed

Helping me grow, now

I have to go –

a head start

All the crap

stuck in these spokes might slow me down

But watch me folks –

I’ll turn it around; I’ve done it before,

it’s no big deal; I’m meant to heal.

What I need, is to unload;

Unseal & reveal; don’t conceal

this great upheaval

Out of commission –

a deadly killer

of Souls n Spirits.

All alone – I battle demons;

no one knows

the much I’ve grown

As I unburden

all the hurtin’ from all those fears

over the years.

I still stand tall.

Can you feel me

Stuck in the middle

This twisted riddle

Can I can keep up the fight

in which he takes such delight?

Against the wall; I will not fall

I still stand tall – can’t make me small.

I try to smile, but it’s congealed

it’s been awhile, this longest mile;

I need a break. How much to take?

Still crushing me – I cannot breathe;

I hafta leave

let go, forget

let’s hope I have at least one trick

left up my sleeve; Oh pretty please

It’s been so long – that same old song;

the love is gone.

Too much pain so

Alone

I was afraid, I guess.

Oh God – don’t say

that in this bed I lay, I made

I cannot stay, I don’t belong

Here; no surprise,

had I been more wise

I’d have seen the signs

Recognized the lies

hiding in plain sight

behind those eyes.

Reaching out after all these years

Please empathize.

I’m so damn tired

shedding all these tears

dry; as they continue

to fall upon deaf ears

I cried, I screamed –

I wasted

all those years.

Can I fend; lend me a friend,

a helping hand? Maybe take a stand

Around the bend, wanting to defend

the true & just; this broken heart

can’t fall apart – a few cracks

won’t hold me back – it’s on the mend.

I begin again.

No you don’t save me – that one’s on me

To save myself & all I missed

A kiss –

so much.

I’m not alone –

I never was. I’m not afraid.

Can you, oh heart, love💞one💞again?



You know I can. I am.

Made of Love – I rise above.

Don’t you know who I am? Love💞



Can’t keep Me down

Oh no, my heart;

you’re so intense – right into shape you pop again;

Back to life. So nice💞

My heart

cannot be handled; they can’t grasp, don’t understand it.

And so, it made me wonder where’s the one who can

Match it 💞💃🕺💞

Did we hafta dig outta the rubble

we got stuck under, after our stumble?

And the eyes of fierce tornadoes we were put asunder?

Our ancient, unaware selves.

It’s good – we learned

We grew

from the burns.

Now well aware, we appreciate

Never take for granted;

Fulfill every wish:

I don’t ever wanna miss

that kind of kiss. Bliss.

No conditions or repetitions

goodbye.

There’s only Now

To give, not keep

I wanna go

Down down so deep

Haven’t lost it all just yet;

Here I am

I’m back again.

I want to love again

It’s time to fly

I met a friend

It’s You & I;

So get on up –

jump, reach up; you can

Touch the Sky.

Every word, worn like a cape,

a great escape; they give me wings

Now I can fly

I reach right in

& my oh my –

Oh Soul; goosebumps

bowling me over – am I drunk?

Gotta sober up –

the dance ain’t over

We’re just getting started.

Take my hand; I know you know –

you understand; it’s fuckin’ grand

We’ll make a stand

Let’s go for broke 💞


‘Without a Word:’ Poems From My Teenage Self (Pt 3)

Without a Word (1987 so 16 yrs old)


You needn’t say a word

your deepest thoughts can still be heard

inside my heart

looking into your longing eyes

all I need

your true feelings

you cannot disguise

but even if I was to close my eyes

I can listen to my heart

my soul

they know that without you

it’d be a world so cold

when I want to know what is true

what is real

I know

without a word

I can hear how you feel

your lips don’t lie to me

your eyes always let me see

this is real

real love.

A couple minor tweaks here & there – it was written exactly 30 yrs ago – I’ve done some growing since then 🤓 Had to change that middle line – couldn’t say it cuz I don’t feel it; “it knows that without you I will never be whole” nope, not true – not authentic it had to go 💕🤗💕


“From the Heart” is what I entitled my book of poetry💕💕& here I see this pic I made last year, drawn to the same lovely words 🙄

Yup, 30 yr old papers .. donning the tattered look.

That Smile 😁 It Looks So Good On You!

Smile~

Life is so much sweeter when you do;

It’s a look that looks really, really good on you.

When you’re smiling –

You’re happy

Hard not to be

Then you’ll realize

That all along

You never needed a reason.

It’s a look in style at every season!

So come what may –

or what may not;

When you never expect –

you’re never without.

Don’t let a frown drown you down

down

down.

You are the master of your domain

& from suffering you refrain.

When you break free from those chains,

You’ll see –

Nothing’s ever quite the same.